07. To The People Who Accidentally Became Important

Dear People Who Accidentally Became Important,

I’ve met more people than I could possibly remember. If you’ve seen my previous post on conversations that changed my life, you’re well aware that often faces get blurry and names get forgotten, even when the story remains.

Thanks to social media, a big chunk of the people I’ve met traveling become my followers, and I become theirs. We don’t really talk, but we eventually get to see their cat back home, how they bike to work, or (bonus points for unlikelihood) how their engagement turned out. It’s an almost accidental parasocial relationship. “Feed friends”, I like to call them.

And then there’s the last group: a tiny percentage of people who stay. I’m not entirely sure why, but I have some theories.

• Theory #1 – the friendship timeline gets compressed, because time works differently when we’re traveling. One day can feel like a month and the constant sense that the clock’s ticking makes us quickly jump from a polite chitchat to sharing a beer, then the sunscreen, then a plastic fork, then our deepest fears.Still, I believe connections are more about how, not how long. Traveling gives us freedom of being. The fact that no one knows our “real” self, contrary to popular belief, gives us the chance to focus more on being, and less on trying to be. I’m not saying we’re completely different people when we’re traveling, but I do think we drop most of the performance. And what’s left is an authenticity that cares very little about impression or reputation. That’s where I find my realest self.
• Theory #2 – We have no shared background. Most of the times, all we have in common is that we both ended up in the same bunkbed, in the same town, with the same vague plan to “go somewhere after”. And yet, from there, something opens up. We realize we see the world the same way, or at least laugh at the same weird stuff. It’s like the bond starts by chance and deepens by choice.
• Theory #3 – Finally, and what fascinates me the most, is how these friendships usually survive change. We grow, move, lose touch, evolve into slightly different people. Yet, the bond remains oddly intact, maybe because it was never based on daily updates or consistent hangouts, but on who we were, right then, in that very specific moment. And somehow, that moment keeps echoing forward. It’s like we connect through a single fragment of who are (or were), but the one that matters.

Do these theories have scientific backing? Maybe… I honestly didn’t check and I couldn’t be bothered.

They’re simply my humble attempt to explain something that holds a lot of weight in how I see traveling and people. They’re also a clumsy way… i guess… to say thanks everyone who has played a part in shaping who I am today. Thanks for being the kind of strangers I couldn’t forget.

If I ever write a biography, it won’t really be JUST mine, because whether you like it or not, you’re part of me!

See you somewhere, sometime, somehow!

Xoxo, Hugo

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Warning: Following may result in spontaneous one-way ticket purchases and an irrational fear of itineraries.