Learning to overcome negative thoughts
You ever have those days where your brain just won’t give you a break? Like, you mess up once, maybe say something awkward in class, get a not-so-great grade or scroll through someone else’s perfect-looking life online and suddenly your mind’s like “You’re not good enough” “Why are you like this?” or “Everyone else has it together except you.”
Yeah… same.
It took me a while (and I’m still learning) but I realized those thoughts? They’re not the truth. They’re just thoughts. And even though they feel real, I’ve been learning that we don’t have to believe everything our minds tell us, especially the negative stuff.
🙇🏼♂️Where the thoughts come from
Sometimes, negative thoughts come from stress, anxiety or just being tired. Other times, they’re rooted in stuff we’ve been through, like bullying, pressure to be perfect or comparing ourselves constantly on social media. It’s hard not to feel like you’re falling behind when it looks like everyone else is thriving. But here’s something no one tells you enough: you only see the highlight reel. No one’s posting their bad days, their mental breakdowns or the times they felt like quitting.
And here’s another thing I’ve been noticing: we get mad or upset so quickly. At others, at ourselves, at little things that don’t actually deserve that much power over us. We give these moments too much weight, like one off day means everything is falling apart. But it doesn’t. Most of the time, it’s just a moment. Not a verdict on who you are.
Letting small things take up too much space in our heads is exhausting. I’ve been trying to pause and ask myself: “Is this really that deep?” Most of the time, it’s not.
💡Tips on how to handle negative thoughts
Here are a few things that have actually helped me when I’m stuck in my own head:
-
💬 Talk to someone: A friend, a family member, a teacher or a psychologist. Just saying what’s on your mind out loud helps way more than you think.
-
📝 Write it out: Journaling sounds cheesy but getting your thoughts on paper can help you understand them better.
-
❓Challenge the thought: If I think, “I always mess things up,” I ask myself, “Really? Always? What about the time I helped my friend through a rough patch or finished that project on time?” You start to realize your mind is exaggerating.
-
🧡 Be kinder to yourself: I’m trying to treat myself the way I’d treat someone I care about. I’d never tell a friend they’re a failure or not good enough. So why say it to myself?
-
🌿 Take a mindful moment: When I feel overwhelmed, I try to step away from distractions and just breathe. Whether it’s a short walk, listening to music or sitting with a cup of tea. Doing something simple and grounding helps bring me back to the present.
⏳It’s a process
Overcoming negative thoughts isn’t like flipping a switch. It’s more like training your brain to look at things differently little by little. Some days are better than others and that’s okay.
A Simple Exercise for You to Try
Changing how we think doesn’t happen overnight but every small step counts.
👉 Take a moment right now to notice one negative thought you’ve had today.
Then ask yourself: Would I say this to someone I care about?
If not, rewrite it in a kinder way. Speak to yourself like you’d speak to your best friend.
🔈Previously on the blog: Catch Up Here!
- Lessons on Finding True Happiness
- The Price Tag on Happiness
- The Myth of Happier Times
- Why Your Relationships Might Be the Real Key to Joy
- Disconnect to Reconnect with Reality
